I felt instantly at ease talking to Oliver, despite how unsure I was before we spoke, and whenever we talk I feel like he’s an old friend who gets where I’m coming from. He’s able to offer tools and insights from his own lifetime of deep personal growth and healing work and I absolutely recommend Oliver as a safe person to talk through whatever you might be going through. I feel so much less isolated since the sessions I’ve had and am impressed with who he is today as a result of his own wisdom and effort.
Alexi, England
I first became aware of Oliver’s work while in a relationship with a man enmeshed with his mother. I felt intense anger over the injustice of how a once promising life had been effectively taken hostage by manipulation masquerading as love. His apparent lack of awareness of his predicament only deepened my hurt and frustration. Impressed by Oliver’s expertise and depth of knowledge on the subject of family enmeshment, I contacted him and arranged some one-to-one sessions. After speaking for many months, over which time Oliver gently steered me away from my preoccupation with my partner and his mother, I had a profound insight. During one session, he had asked me to return to a significant and extremely painful childhood memory I had previously revealed to him. I did not recall much of my childhood, and I was baffled as to why this one memory endured so vividly. As I recalled it once again, it suddenly hit me. I was enmeshed with my father. It was a painful reality I would never have previously been able, or ready, to conceive of. The realisation that within the man I had drawn into my life, onto whom I was projecting so much frustration and anger, was a mirror being held up to my own unconscious. It was a game-changing moment. Since then, the work continues (no, there is no quick fix) but so much has already changed to improve my life and well being - self-compassion, self-trust and, perhaps for the first time in my life, a defined sense of self. To my mind, Oliver is a master in his field with an attunement that offered the safety and trust necessary for me to become aware of and acknowledge an aspect of myself that had negatively impacted my entire life, an aspect I was blindly unaware was even hidden from view.
Jackie, UK
I was going through complex personal issues; feeling lost, unable to find a direction and feeling worthless at times. I was also exhausted with overwhelming expectations from friends, family and at work. Meeting Oliver through a friend’s recommendation has been like a breath of fresh air, as they say, after having tried a few therapists and a clinical psychologist, with not much benefit, as it was just felt like the same monotonous series of bookish questions and similar answers. Oliver brings freshness in his discussion, making you comfortable to open up about your problems without realising that there is a discussion on your problems. I felt heard, found solutions, he helped me reflect on my insecurities, and we discussed options on how I can bring about a change in my life by understanding and accepting my past and make a positive change towards my future.
Katrina, England
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''The site was found by accident, and it is exactly what I need at this time of my life. Sometimes we are so close to the trees we can not see the forest. Actually I was not expecting to get fast and personal attention. You were very prompt in replying with point on what I needed. The motivational information is right on. I am grateful I found this site and of course will check with it often. THANK YOU!''
Kenneth Franklin Priddy
''Lady's and gentleman, I wish to bestow the most authentic and deserving accolades upon Oliver JR Cooper. Oliver's writings are a breeding ground for hope , therapy , wisdom , compassion , empathy and encouragement . Oliver possesses a unique intrinsic gift of writing with scholarly efficacy. This gentleman has blessed my life and enriched it with his knowledge and humility. I would recommend, that anyone with relationship issues, or depression to read Oliver's work and purchase his materials as their lives will be blessed. I fully endorse this gentleman's brilliant contributions towards the well of world humanity. Oliver's sensitive , compassionate approach blesses lives.''
''Hello Oliver, I came across your web page as a result of you posting a comment on my blog, "Thinking Matters". I just looked at your site and had to let you know how impressed I am with your insight and writing!! Keep up the good work-for you are certainly not "another brick in the wall". Really enjoyed reading your articles.''
''I'm thrilled to have Oliver JR Cooper offering his advice and insight as a Contributing Editor. His articles have had over 85,000 click through's... no small feat. His perspective on love, relationships, self-identity and authenticity are amazing. Oliver provides to-the-point, real life guidance, and answers to today's essential questions.''
''Behaviour: What Causes Reactive Behaviour? Is a great article and one that I can really relate to. So much clarity in his writing which I would recommend to anyone who feels certain aspects of their lives are not normal in a sense. Thanks Oliver, keep up the great work, there's a star in the making here! Take note.''
David Pegler
''Your articles are well written, concise and so helpful. I can see more clearly where to dig and understand why. Thanks!''
Linda Dee Dalloul
''Hi Oliver, I just happened to stumble across your Facebook page and now I’m your avid follower. I’ve read through some of your writings and I cannot believe the truth in the stuff you write. Whilst reading, I see myself in certain scenarios and the faults I possess when in a relationship. Your blogs and posts really inspire me and I’m sure a lot of people too. Thank you for the encouragement & for the light you shed on certain aspects of relationships. THANK YOU!!''
''Hi Oliver, I came across this article a year ago (Abusive Parents: Why Do They Deny What Happened?), and it changed my life. It opened up new things to me, I thought deeply about every single thing, and traced things in my mind and worked things out, and even came up with additional theories of my own.
I am out of the cycle of abuse now (I think - I am away from the abusers anyway) and my life is starting to make sense, why I'm here, that I was RIGHT all along, about the abuse, what it was doing to me, that I didn't "bring it on myself", everything. I have read a lot of things, but this right here, is what really got my brain flowing more than anything. Thank you, you have saved a life :)''
David S
''Oliver's no nonsense approach to life's painful and often debilitating taboo subjects is a breath of fresh air. I would highly recommend his deeply insightful articles to those looking for relief from personal emotional suffering and professionals alike. ''
Karen. - Bacp Accredited Counsellor
''I just recently began reading Oliver's writing after a friend on twitter shared. He is very wise and insightful. I appreciate that he is able to convey complex messages in a way that is easily understandable and concise. His writing is bringing clarity to the situations I have been through and will hopefully help me to live a happier life in the future. He was also very kind and genuinely cares. It has been a gift to find his articles! ''
Stephanie Major
''Relationships: Why Do Some People Feel Unlovable? Is definitely the most insightful article that I can relate to that I have ever read. Thank you so much, how do you know all of this. No one that I have had therapy with has ever been able to really understand me. Life has been so difficult, this article makes me tear up, I really don't know how to thank you. Wish it could transform me though, but I am working on it everyday, but time is limited. So many regrets, so many. Thank you again, keep up the great work that you are doing. I will look forward to your posts on Tony's blog and your articles.''
Deanna DeLaura
''Oliver, I am a big fan of soul searching and self awareness. I came across your page while looking for some intellectual topic. I must say your articles are well written and easy to understand. And I had to let you know how grateful I was to find your site. I will keep coming back to read more. Thanks!''
Sonia Kohli
''You explain very complex processes in such easy-to-understand and non threatening ways. It's amazing. I'm a new fan!! Thank you.''
Darlene
''I reached out to Oliver after finding his website while I was researching information for my photography book, a memoir depicting an abusive family and ultimate mental collapse of my mother. I had asked Oliver to write a foreword for this book, and he had responded promptly and agreed to do the work after reviewing my material. What is unique about Oliver's writings, what had drawn me to him to write my foreword, is his ability to write from the heart. Oliver writes without drama, that is to say he writes from a place of fact and understanding for how things are; yet he maintains a certain level of care to deliver his information with thoughtfulness. By doing so Oliver is able to remove a layer of confusion while simultaneously creating a safe space. He does not let his readers down with cold hard facts, but brings them in for a metaphorical hug as the delusions melt away into understanding.''
''Hi Oliver. I would like to thank you for your articles. I am really thankful to have come across your writings about relationship. These articles: "Why do some women attract controlling men?" and "Why are some men controlling?” have helped me to see from a different perspective and deepen my understandings to reflect on my situation. I am very thankful that I have got myself out of a controlling relationship. Right now, I am comfortable and happy being the person I've become. From the bottom of my heart, thank you Oliver!''
Alison Wong
"I always enjoy your articles as they are concise and to the point...easy to read and connect with the essence of your messages. When we are submersed in our deep, difficult and sometimes chaotic emotions of the issues you raise, it can be so difficult to navitgate them. Long, drawn out, complex explanations can also lead us to feel helpless. That is why I appreciate your work..it brings me to hope and clarity. I have been following your work for so many years and im very grateful. Thank you Oliver." Nella Damato
''Hi Oliver!
I wanted to just say you are a amazing writer and I really enjoy reading your articles! It also gives me a different perspective on the same sided coin.''
Janis Chan
"I randomly came across Oliver’s website some time ago, through an article he had written on ego boundaries. I returned back to it after some time, to realize the content on it is the most accurate I can find on the topic. I am so happy and grateful that I had the chance to find out his work and after reading more of his articles, I can confidently say that Oliver is a true specialist in the field of psychology and an authentic writer, but most importantly possessing qualities such as kindness, insight and helpfulness, for people who are looking for a change of any kind. A big thank you."
Eri Gjuzi
"I originally found Oliver JR Cooper‘s site because of my personal wish to understand narcissistic, emotional, and psychological abuse better. This is a very neglected health topic because there are no visible scars to prove any wrongdoing. Oliver takes us deep into not only what he has personally experienced, but he also takes us on a pathway toward healing and hope. His compassionate and sensitive understanding of other people is a true credit to his integrity. My highest compliments to Oliver for his contribution toward helping others."
