For a number of years, I thought that the reason we projected our inner world/issues onto others was due to a lack of awareness; therefore, this wouldn’t take place if someone was self-aware. This was something that I was fairly convinced of.
I think I even wrote a number of articles where I went into this, and this is what I would usually say if I was having a conversation with someone. It took me a little while to come to this conclusion.
Over The years
Up until this point in time, I had read a number of books, worked with different therapists and healers, and listened to different audio books. Furthermore, I had spent a lot of time reflecting on this.
Fortunately, I had an open mind and was open to hearing things that went against what I believed to be true. As a result of this, I was willing to think about another way of looking at why projection takes place.
This was something that I believed until around 2015 or 2016, and then it all changed after working with a therapist called Vijay Rana. I can’t remember exactly how we ended up talking about this, but what I do remember is that Vijay had another outlook.
He said that he had heard that the reason we project our inner world/issues onto others, is so that we can become aware of what is taking place within us. This is not something that can happen directly, so it has to happen indirectly.
The mind - with all its defence mechanisms - does what it can to stop someone from being aware of what is taking place in their body. This then causes them to lose touch with how they feel, amongst others things.
For that reason, it is not possible for this information to enter their mind, which is why it has to appear externally. The trouble with this is that when their inner “material” appears externally, it can be easy for them to believe that it is has got absolutely nothing to do with them.
It Made Sense
When Vijay mentioned this I thought that what he said was interesting and it really made me think. On my way home, I reflected on what he said and I thought that this was a far better way of looking at this defence mechanism.
As I look back on this moment, I can’t say that I’m not surprised that I heard this when I was working with Vijay. Firstly, he was a great therapist, and, secondly, he had a way of putting information and ideas forward without coming across as patronising or as though he knew it all.
I think that what this emphasises is how important it is to have an open mind, as there is always something new to learn. There was another time when we spoke about repetition compulsion, but I will go into that in another article.
Vijay is an excellent therapist, and this is why I am grateful that our paths crossed. If you would like to find out more about Vijay, and the services that he offers, please go to - http://www.vijayrana.co.uk/.